masked

I'm alone to face the world with only a mask to shield my true feelings. I convince ma self that I'm OK so it will be easy to convince others that I'm on top of the world but who I'm i deceiving? even my mum can c through me and it hurts that i cant use this mask to shied ma self from her. Ive got so much to let out and so much to say but no 1 will ever possibly understand what it is I'm going through. But Ive but others through worse and secretly i hate my self for it. times like that i wish i could change but i can't. i can only make things better but how? i can't focus people.